In which I desperately attempt to make sense of the absolute mess that was Bolin's relationship with Eska in Book 2 of Legend of Korra.
I recently re-watched Book 2 with a friend of mine, and, well, we noticed some flaws. (That's a bit of an understatement - you could cover an entire wall in tally marks just counting how many times we cursed the utterly frustrating nonsense that everything had somehow become reduced to. But, uh, points for ambition, I guess?)
I could talk about a lot of different things about Book 2, and I have, at length, with a few people. But what I really feel the need to discuss here is the Bolin/Eska romance plotline.
And the reason this is nagging at me is because it is unlike a lot of the flaws of Book 2. Usually, in Book 2, if something didn't make any logical sense, it could be counted on to make emotional or thematic sense on some level, (and also be aesthetically awesome). This wasn't like that. The relationship didn't seem to make any kind of sense at all, emotional, logical, or otherwise. And that's bothersome, for a show like Korra, which has such a noble history of cohesive and compelling storytelling under its belt.
So this is me, attempting to examine this odd apparent misstep in the narrative, and figure out why it makes sense in the story.
Okay, so the first thing I want to clarify is how I'm going to be looking at it: my primary focus isn't going to be pointing out how abusive the Eska/Bolin relationship was, or the rather disturbing way it was treated as comic relief. This obviously exists, and it sucks, and it's important. But a lot of other people have made precisely the same point (this one and this one spell it out pretty clearly, though fair warning, the latter is written a tad aggressively) and I'm not interested in rehashing points I've already seen and heard. Instead, I will be trying to explain why the way this relationship played out makes sense for the characters themselves, and the situations they're in.
I will, however, be taking for granted that the relationship was emotionally abusive, because from what I've observed in life and on the show, it most definitely was. If you disagree with that, then sorrynotsorry. Check out my Bolin defense instead, maybe? My boy needs some love.
Alright, so let's start where things make sense. Bolin sees Eska and Desna, and, after figuring out which is which, approaches Eska and begins clumsily flirting. After Eska realizes what's going on, she claims him as her boyfriend/slave, grabs him by the collar and physically drags him out of the shot, which is pretty much the perfect representation of the rest of this relationship.
Bolin's motivations, at least, are clear. He needs a win.
This is true in his life in general - his pro-bending team sucks now, his friends and brother have all moved on and are doing their own things - but I think it's also true in his romantic life specifically. I don't think he actually got over Korra all that quickly - I know it isn't explicitly brought up after The Spirit of Competition, but hear me out. I'm convinced that there are moments in Book 1 which might actually indicate that Bolin is very much not over her yet. For instance, when Asami starts asking about possible feelings that Mako might have for Korra, Bolin brings up the infamous kiss very quickly, for someone who is simultaneously trying to defend his brother - almost as though it's been on his mind. And I think this short analysis on the subject does a good job of painting a picture of the situation. Also it gave me feelings.
So, then Mako and Korra get together, which is great for them (or is it?) but probably sucks for Bolin's self-esteem, loath as he would be to admit it. And by the time we check in with Team Avatar at the beginning of Book 2, Bolin has spiraled downward pretty steadily. His introductory moment is a pretty definite contrast to Mako's - he's losing horribly at something we know that he was actually really good at, while Mako is becoming very successful and obviously finding fulfillment in a job that we've never even seen him do before. It's more than Bolin not having had any upward trajectory - he's actually, somehow, deteriorated.
All this kind of explains why he sticks with Eska through their questionable beginning. The poor boy needs a win. Yeah, she's a little cold and antisocial, but she's choosing him. That's success, at this point in Bolin's mentality.
I wish I could speculate on Eska's reasoning behind the relationship, but alas, Eska is underdeveloped and seems to exist purely as a "comedic" foil for Bolin, so there isn't much I can say about that.
So, okay, they continue to pursue whatever the hell it is that they have. They even have a decent moment or two, which aren't abusive or indicative of anything harmful.
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| Eska: Don't worry. I will protect you, my feeble turtle-duck. Bolin: Thank you. |
Eska: Why are you initiating physical contact with another woman?
And, naturally, things only disintegrate from there. The next time we see Eska and Bolin, he is... dragging Eska and Desna around in a cart? Because apparently that's a thing that happens. He then earthbends steps for them as they get out of the chariot - I think he actually kneels as he does it? - which could be taken as a kind of visual metaphor: he's being walked all over. So, yeah, things have not gotten better.
So Bolin decides that this relationship is no longer a win and he really wants out. There really isn't much to be said about his reasoning behind that - he's obviously scared of his girlfriend, so he probably feels unsafe or intimidated in some way. Anyone would want out.
At which point, I'll address this before it comes up - people seemed to view Eska as a "strong female character", and I don't want people to mistake my use of the word "intimidation" to think that it means that he was feeling intimidated by her strength, in a Freudian "I'm feeling emasculated" way. Remember, this guy was in love with Korra in part because of her strength. Bolin doesn't resent strong women. He is, though, obviously uncomfortable and, arguably, fearful when Eska is around. He looks terrified every time he sees her. He's begging for people to help him get out of this relationship. He even refers to threatening behaviour, which happens off-screen.
Bolin: You guys gotta save me.
Mako: I thought you were breaking up with her. What happened to ripping off the leech?
Bolin: I tried! But anytime I bring up the subject she threatens to freeze me in a block of ice and feed me to dolphin piranhas!
This isn't that Bolin doesn't know how to life choices, or that he's fickle, or uncommitted, or whatever. This is that the relationship he's in with Eska is damaging to Bolin emotionally, and he needs an exit strategy.
Unfortunately, as my friend with real life experience will tell you, it is very difficult to back out of a relationship so unhealthy. The abuser will often become clingier, more manipulative, and do everything they can to make sure that the victim feels like the unreasonable one. And this is demonstrated in Bolin and Eska's relationship (in "comically" exaggerated fashion which is typical of this entire storyline) when he comes clean and tries to break up with her, and she forces betrothal on him.
Eska: You may express your joy through tears.
At which point, it occurs to me to mention that there is a definite power imbalance here, and it leans toward Eska. Because, if you think about it, Eska is essentially a princess. She's the daughter of the chief of the Northern Water Tribe, which has shown itself to be much more lux, rich, and aristocratic than its southern counterpart, and she has a lot of power over this place by virtue of being Unalaq's daughter. Contrast this with Bolin, who grew up a homeless orphan with almost nothing, and has almost no external power whatsoever. Now, this dynamic isn't necessarily problematic, if it were mutually respectful. However, the fact that this power imbalance exists is a fact which makes it easy for Eska to tip the scales in her favour. I mean, she and Desna are even trailed by bodyguards who follow their orders everywhere they go, a fact which quite possibly plays into Bolin's inability to escape without outright fleeing.
Which he does. And then we don't really see the two interact again until the end of the season. There are two important hints about their mindsets, though, in Peacekeepers.
Hint number one: When Varrick explains his idea for the propaganda films, he shows a reel of footage he took of the Northern Tribe invading the South. There's a closeup of Eska, and Bolin screams in fear. Evidently, he's still scared of her, and doesn't seem to be remembering her fondly, if you see what I mean.
Hint number two: Eska hunts down Korra because Unalaq said so, but also, apparently, because she "stole" Bolin. That makes pretty much no sense, considering how little Korra seemed to care about Bolin during their entire time in the Water Tribe, but to be fair, Eska had previously displayed insecurity/discomfort around Bolin's ease with Korra, so it isn't exactly out of character I guess. It also shows her possessiveness once again.
And this is where the relationship is pre-Darkness Falls. Obviously horridly abusive, but still making sense, in terms of characters. It's easy to understand that Bolin is scared of Eska, and that, as far as we know, Eska is still very possessive of Bolin. This is obviously not a healthy dynamic, but it's one that we, as an audience, can comprehend.
Then Darkness Falls happens, and things make less sense.
Bolin and Mako are holding off Unalaq to stop him from getting back into the spirit world and interfering with Korra's confrontation with Vaatu. Unalaq conscripts the twins to help him out, as he is wont to. Eska targets Bolin and Desna targets Mako. And, well, Bolin's reaction upon seeing Eska again is not just surprise. It's pretty much unadulterated terror.
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| Oh yeah. He's so in love. |
Then he confesses his love for her - while trapped in a block of ice, I might add - and that's where things get weird.
Bolin: (while crying hysterically) I'm sorry, it's just so sad - that I'll never be with you again...
Eska: What? Explain yourself further.
Bolin: Eska, I've always loved you, and I've always wanted to be with you, but now that the world is ending - I'm never gonna get that chance!
Eska: We could have been together, but you left me at the altar!
Bolin: I was scared! I was scared of my true feelings for you! Gah! I should never have left you. I'm sorry. And I'm sorry that we'll never have the chance to rekindle the dying ember that was our love into a big fire of love flames!
(Eska kisses him)
Now, my first reading of this scene is that, wow, Bolin's acting plotline actually has some relevance in the main plot! That's... actually pretty awesome!
But then this exchange with Mako happens:
Mako: Wow, that was the best acting I've ever seen! You completely fooled her!
Bolin: Yeah, right, that... that was acting. (wipes a tear away)
which seems to imply that he actually wasn't really acting, and that complicates things a little bit.
Because the thing is, he said some stuff in there that was patently untrue. We know he hasn't "always wanted to be with her". He lived in fear of her! He ran away from her! He begged people to "save" him! We never once see him thinking about her while in Republic City! He most definitely did not want to be with her.
So, needless to say, I found it pretty puzzling. But, after examining that particular confession of love a little closer, something occurred to me that I hadn't really taken note of before, and that's that Bolin is completely at Eska's mercy in this scene. Which, actually, might be the key to the whole thing.
Because Bolin is completely helpless here, and it's at the hands of this person, who we have seen use the ice technique on him before, and who has canonically engaged in threatening behaviour against him, even if it happened offscreen. And if Bolin was ever going to be the most scared of her, it would be now - he's essentially left her at the altar, he's participated in undermining her in the eyes of her father, has been actively working against her and her family, and now he physically can't escape her. It's one of the more important reasons the apparently genuine confession of love seems so out of place.
But the more I think about it, the more likely it seems to me that this confession of love isn't necessarily genuine. It seems more like a defense mechanism that Bolin may have used on a smaller scale when he was dating Eska - an attempt to appease her so she wouldn't be threatening him.
That would explain how some of the things he says comes out. "No, I was scared!" Yes, you were. "I was scared of my true feelings for you!" No, you weren't. It seems like a really quick amendment when he realizes that telling her how terrified he is of her isn't going to get him on her good side.
(Also, to paint Bolin as having commitment issues just straight up doesn't make any sense. The guy is loyal to a fault. It's sort of a defining character trait.)
It would also explain the "Yeah, right, that was acting" comment, because it really wasn't, at least, not in the way that Bolin, as Nuktuk, knows acting. He didn't play out an emotion he didn't have, he gave a different explanation for one he really felt - fear.
All this would be a great explanation, if Light in the Dark didn't completely undermine everything I just said. That actual canon sure is pesky, ain't it?
So, Bolin, Mako, Tenzin, and basically everyone are fighting off a bunch of dark spirits. As Bolin is fighting, he gets snatched by one, and is pretty much about to die, when a water whip comes out of nowhere and saves his life. It's Eska. He screams, "Eska! I love you!" kisses her cheek, and then goes, "Let's face the end of the world together!" to which Eska replies, "You're so romantic." Later on, he invites Eska to live with him in Republic City because he's "not really a fan of the long-distance relationship thing" (just wait until you meet Opal, buddy), which seemed so entirely out of left field that I didn't really know what to do with it.
Anyway, Eska refuses, saying that she "became caught up in the moment" but that she would "remember him fondly."
And I have issues with this because I kind of despise the way that the relationship ends up being broken off for good because Eska isn't feeling it. Rather than, I don't know, Bolin putting his foot down. Because what we really need is for the abuser to be okay with the relationship ending. That's the real conflict that needs resolution here, right? Ugh. But that's just my trademark sidetracking, don't mind me.
My main issue here is that it doesn't seem to make any sense. Why is Bolin suddenly into her again? After all the fear and abuse? She rescued him and he completely forgot everything she did to him? What in the hell is going on here?
So, I watched it again, trying to find a thread to follow, and when I did, the first thing I noticed was that Bolin's "Eska! I love you!" reminded me of something that had happened a little earlier in the series. And the closer I looked at it, the more the scenes seemed weirdly similar (I apologize for my giffing skills, the screenshots wouldn't work unless the runtime was showing on Netflix):
(I like how Mako expresses concern for his brother's well-being, and Eska doesn't even address him. "My Bolin" makes this still about her.)
So... there are parallels here. I mean, his actions are even the same. The clasped hands and then the spread arms?
Okay, okay, I know this seems blasphemous, to compare the abusive and unbalanced romance that Bolin had with Eska to the sweet, protective, loving brotherhood that Bolin has with Mako, but hear me out here.
When Bolin tells Mako that he loves him, there's obviously no question about it. Mako is his brother, Mako has always protected Bolin while they were doing whatever they had to do on the streets, and in general, has always been there for him.
When Bolin tells Eska he loves her, considering their history, well, that's a little weirder. But... worth looking at. Because, the thing is, the first confession of love could be written off as a move to get Eska on their side - it certainly didn't seem to ring true. This one seems much more off-the-cuff, and so, on some level, genuine. He thinks it's true in that moment.
So what do these scenes have in common? Protection. In both scenes, these people are protecting Bolin.
Now, let's look at that within the context of Bolin's life. Bolin has always had someone, and, notably, that someone has always been protecting him. We know that the one person Bolin can honestly, consistently say that he loves is Mako. We know that Mako is the sort to compulsively protect people, and until Book 2 and late Book 1, that person was Bolin. So it isn't a stretch, really, to infer that Bolin's perception of love is that love and protection are very closely linked, if not one and the same.
Also remember that Bolin is very much an "actions speak louder than words" kinda guy. So, when Eska does this, it's where she proves, in Bolin's mind, that she actually does care. She put herself in a vulnerable position to save him. Now, whether that's the same way that Eska saw what she was doing, I'm not sure. But that's probably how Bolin saw it. And if Bolin equates protection with love, then Eska, in Bolin's language, just told him that she loved him. When, as a result, he exclaims, "Eska! I love you!" he is reciprocating, not initiating.
Which makes that scene make a little more sense, to me, anyways.
Add that to their past, wherein she was, as far as we as an audience are aware, Bolin's first girlfriend, it kind of makes sense that he would try to rekindle something with her. I know I kind of dismissed previously the narrative in which Bolin confesses his love for Eska because he genuinely still has feelings for her. That's far from impossible, as we know from actual abuse victims, and while I don't think it really plays very much into the first love confession - that still feels like a "let's get out of this ice prison" thing to me - I can definitely see how it would begin to affect things the moment that Eska begins to demonstrate any attachment.
So when he asks Eska to come with him back to Republic City, it's because in his mind, she has confirmed that she really does care about him, maybe even love him, and maybe she always did. Thus, the relationship goes back to being a "win", if you see what I mean.
Bolin: So, I was thinking, I'm not really into the long distance relationship thing, so how about you move to Republic City with me?
Eska: I do not think it will be possible.
Bolin: Okay, Desna can come too.
Eska: I will not be joining you, Bolin. Desna and I must return home.
Bolin: But you said -
Eska: Eternal darkness was upon us. I became caught up in the moment.
Bolin: Yeah. I guess I did too.
I maintain that the "moment" that Bolin got caught up in is not the one where he's begging to be free from his ice prison and definitely the one where Eska saves him from the spirit. Which means that my initial analysis of the moment in Darkness Falls is actually not undercut by what happens in Light in the Dark. Which is nice.
The other thing, which I think is interesting, and kind of plays into Eska and Bolin's final conversation, is that, remember how I talked about the power imbalance before, and how Eska is innately accorded more power due to the contrast between her position and Bolin's poverty? By the end of Book 2, that isn't exactly true anymore. Bolin has climbed the social ladder. In Republic City, and, judging by Book 3, in places in the Earth Kingdom as well, he's a celebrity now. And he's been living it up. I mean, he has a lot of money, and while "power" doesn't seem like quite the right word to use, it's fair to say that he has a certain amount of influence now. The imbalance... I won't say it no longer exists, because Eska is still basically a princess, but it's definitely less dramatic.
And the reason this strikes me is that Bolin is never before shown as having this much agency in a conversation with Eska. In the few episodes where they existed as a couple, it was usually Eska giving orders, and Bolin not really being sure how to deal with it. In this conversation, aside from Eska pulling the plug, it's pretty much Bolin calling the shots - he suggests moving to Republic City, he reluctantly allows Desna to accompany them. He's grown - he's more confident, and he's more independent, which is clear, because what he's suggesting are decisions that he wouldn't have been able to make at the beginning of the season.
Oh, Jesus. Does that mean that his and Eska's "romance" actually has a place in Bolin's arc? And I've been so accustomed to hating everything to do with Eska. Now I actually have to appreciate it on some level, because Bolin growing as a person is super important to me. Why do I have to make things make sense?
The thing is, though, if you think about Bolin's arc in terms of him growing as an independent person, it really does start to come together. In Book 1, he was sheltered by Mako - in Book 2, he was controlled by Eska, and then Varrick. Obviously his big step toward doing things on his own happens in Night of a Thousand Stars when he single-handedly rescues Raiko from Varrick's henchmen. That can count as him taking back control from Varrick. He'd been moving away from Mako all season, so that was basically mission accomplished. The only other person who Bolin gave such a high degree of control on his life was Eska (well, more accurately, she wrested control of his life from him, but you see my point). And so this scene, in which Bolin and Eska actually converse as equals - more "boyfriend", less "slave" - can be read as the final step of the season for Bolin to assert his independence.
Actually, that could be the reason why Eska unexpectedly appears so briefly in Book 4. Book 4 is when Bolin has grown so much as a person, and as an adult, that he has been actively making his own decisions and forging a path for himself that feels right for him, rather than just following Team Avatar (or Varrick) wherever they go. Eska's appearance could be, like, to contrast Bolin's Book 2 state with his Book 4 state.
Dammit, even Eska has thematic significance. I guess this is what I wanted to accomplish, right? I wanted it to make sense. And now it sort of does. Am I satisfied?
... Yeah. Kind of.
I mean, obviously it wasn't particularly well-executed if I had to wade my way through red herrings to find myself here (this post originally had an entirely different interpretation of Eska's place in Bolin's arc), but still. The fact that I began this adventure in search of Watsonian character motivation and found that and further proof of Bolin's arc is kind of awesome. I think I found some substance in this. And that's pretty satisfying.
Mission accomplished.
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